Kids on the trail and in Shelters etiquette.

**amazing4sg** · 03-22-2007, 15:01

I would like to ask the community of some of the things that they observed or they are strongly against as for people bringing kids to the shelters. Has any one ever had a bad experience with this? The reason I ask is I am relocating to Johnson City and selected this position for the access to the trail for me and my family. We would like to spend a lot of time on the trail and break in to some overnighters and I am just concerned for the trail etiquette of this and want to make sure that we do not offend the community or have an impact on it in a negative way. My kids are 7 and 4 and are well mannered I would like to expose them to another side of the world and let them meet all different kinds of people in a good open environment like the outdoors. I am open to advice and opinion no matter what it is. Thank you in advance for any response.

**Midway Sam** · 03-22-2007, 15:08

My only concern is how "well mannered" other people at the shelter are. I know my kids won't be a problem but I'm not sure I want them exposed to some of the conversations and behavior I've witnessed at shelters.

This is not a condemnation of hikers or shelter users, just a parenting decision.

**amazing4sg** · 03-22-2007, 15:09

That was another one of my concerns that I had.

**Bravo** · 03-22-2007, 15:13

Just warn your kids or be prepared for occasional nudity when someone's changing clothes. Possibly some bad language. There's also always a chance of seeing some drinking or dope smoking.

Most of the time people in shelters are considerate of others. Especially if there's kids around. Some people will always be inconsiderate no matter who's around though.

I'm sure your kids would be fine. Just be aware of the reality of the shelters.

**Whitefish** · 03-22-2007, 15:16

Show them the true meaining of camping and avoid them completely.

**Schulo** · 03-22-2007, 15:26

I take my oldest son to the shelters on occasion, he is 14. I always warn him that he may see some nudity and explane that it is no big deal, and to always give the other hikers some form of privicy by not making a big deal of it. As for the dope smoking I do not tolerate it in front of my children. If the other hiker can not show me a little respect by not exposing my child to that world then they get no respect from me and they probably will be packing up and moving along, wether they want to or not.

**amazing4sg** · 03-22-2007, 15:35

Thank you Bravo.

**Rhino-lfl** · 03-22-2007, 15:36

Crap does this mean I can't walk the trail in my speedo?

j/k if people seem oblivious to the kids, remind them that there are kids present. If they still take no mind, club them to death with a piece of wood

**Brrrb Oregon** · 03-22-2007, 15:37

Originally Posted by Bravo

Just warn your kids or be prepared for occasional nudity when someone's changing clothes. Possibly some bad language. There's also always a chance of seeing some drinking or dope smoking.

Most of the time people in shelters are considerate of others. Especially if there's kids around. Some people will always be inconsiderate no matter who's around though.

I'm sure your kids would be fine. Just be aware of the reality of the shelters.

I don't think you can "prepare" a 7 year old, let alone a 4 year old, to witness dope smoking or any other kind of elective drunkenness or to listen to foul language, let alone the casual nudity of strangers in a society in which nudity has been so excessively sexualized. (He or she will grow to know that nudity is sexualized in our culture, if he or she doesn't now.) If that is not normally something you want your kids to be exposed to, then don't allow it just because you're in the great outdoors.

I saw drunks when I was little, people talking the way they'd never talk when they were sober and obviously not totally in control of themselves. I found it scary. I would not have wanted to sleep near them, and these people were not strangers! Either your child will find witnessing that behavior acceptable or they will find it unacceptable...neither one is really a good thing in a young child. If you stay, then this will be the company you have chosen for them to keep, and they will file that away in their little minds.

You can't control what the other adults in the big wide world do, of course, and your kids know that by now. People who are otherwise very agreeable do still make choices that we wouldn't allow ourselves (which goes both ways, for that matter), and that's something we have to live with. Accepting that they have a certain freedom to choose is the price we pay for our own freedom. I don't have a problem with kids knowing that.

You can choose to eat and sleep where the behavior would be tolerable in your own home. If that doesn't describe the shelters--and I have known of places where the adults do act appropriately when they know there are kids around, so it is a fair question--then camp elsewhere. Show that you have the gumption to be where it is physically less comfortable, in order to be where your integrity says you should. Then you won't have to explain why, when they are fifteen and have the choice of remaining where the company is fun but making terrible personal choices, the best idea is to go elsewhere, even if "elsewhere" has its own drawbacks.

Parenting, after all, is all about the long-term picture....this is coming from the mother of eight-year-old twin boys.

**amazing4sg** · 03-22-2007, 15:39

I have thought of that Whitefish and am looking in to possible getting a 3 to 4 person tent an me and my wife sharing the load. I truly do like the solitude of the tent , and it would help out with allot of what all of you are saying. Just trying to find a tent we can all get in to and grow in to over a couple of years is the hard part.

**jesse** · 03-22-2007, 15:42

Show them the true meaining of camping and avoid them completely.

You should at least be prepared to tent, everytime. The shelters might be full! My son and I showed up on a very cold night at a shelter that could have been full, and we were not prepared to tent. That was only our second time on the AT. I later learned that the shelters are full of mice. I probably will not stay in one again.

As far as people who do not like kids, they should also be prepared to tent.

**Brrrb Oregon** · 03-22-2007, 15:53

Originally Posted by amazing4sg

I have thought of that Whitefish and am looking in to possible getting a 3 to 4 person tent an me and my wife sharing the load. I truly do like the solitude of the tent , and it would help out with allot of what all of you are saying. Just trying to find a tent we can all get in to and grow in to over a couple of years is the hard part.

Check with your friends. A lot of times, those bigger tents only go out a few times a year. There are a lot of them stored in garages, begging for an outing. Otherwise, just buy the tent and resign yourself to the fact that you might be selling in someday, to make room for your four new hammocks.

**smokymtnsteve** · 03-22-2007, 15:57

Originally Posted by Schulo

As for the dope smoking I do not tolerate it in front of my children. If the other hiker can not show me a little respect by not exposing my child to that world then they get no respect from me and they probably will be packing up and moving along, wether they want to or not.

amd pray tell,,,how will U accomplish the other hiker packing up and moving along whether they want to or not?

**amazing4sg** · 03-22-2007, 16:03

Rhino i love your post and LOL

**amazing4sg** · 03-22-2007, 16:05

Oregon thank you that was well put. and I Appreciate all of your words.

**amazing4sg** · 03-22-2007, 16:08

I do like the thought of the hammocks.

Originally Posted by Brrrb Oregon

Check with your friends. A lot of times, those bigger tents only go out a few times a year. There are a lot of them stored in garages, begging for an outing. Otherwise, just buy the tent and resign yourself to the fact that you might be selling in someday, to make room for your four new hammocks.

**amazing4sg** · 03-22-2007, 16:11

thank you. and good point

As far as people who do not like kids, they should also be prepared to tent.[/quote]

**Schulo** · 03-22-2007, 16:25

Well smokey I am very convincing when it comes to my kids. And it helps that law inforcement is miles away most of the time, usually brute force is not necessary but when it come to protecting my children, if required can be used.

**NativePennsylvanian** · 03-22-2007, 16:25

Originally Posted by Schulo

I take my oldest son to the shelters on occasion, he is 14. I always warn him that he may see some nudity and explane that it is no big deal, and to always give the other hikers some form of privicy by not making a big deal of it. As for the dope smoking I do not tolerate it in front of my children. If the other hiker can not show me a little respect by not exposing my child to that world then they get no respect from me and they probably will be packing up and moving along, wether they want to or not.

So you strong-arm the dopers and let the naked people be? Son, nevermind the naked man constantly staring at you, I need to to find a rock to smash that kids pipe then a big stick I can chase him away with.

**Schulo** · 03-22-2007, 16:29

We are not talking about people running amuck nude. We are talking about nudity from necessity. Breif nudity has never ruined anyones life, drugs do.

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Kids on the trail and in Shelters etiquette.

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