PFTHD - Post-failed thru hike depression...anyone else?

[Toolshed]

VM, Original intent wasn't to be rude but as a wake-up call.
This is what you wrote me
----
Excuse me? You said no sugar, but you could have included some reality in your outrageously rude response. I'm not supposed to worry about my husband? What? Do you mean that I should go do whatever I want and if my mairrage of nine months fails I should just shrug my shoulders and move on? Do you mean that my pets, who are like my children, should be treated like decorations and allowed to suffer or be mistreated if that's what's convenient for me? And where the hell is the self pity? Saying I won't get another chance at this has nothing to do with pity, it's just the reality of my situation. If I was planning to pity myself it would be over the fact that I probably won't live past 50 due to my weak heart, so I'll barely get to see my kids graduate college. I'll probably never retire and enjoy my grandchildren. Do I pity myself over it? ****ing no. Never have and never will. I just get out and live as much life as I can.
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All of this should have been stuff you considered before stepping on the trail. I don't understand the animal comment - Is your husband doing something to them while you are gone?
But as I PM'ed back, based on your earlier threads, I didn't think you'd make it and I still don't think you'll make it. Everyone else can can console you about your feet or your pets or your plants or your marriage, but this was all stuff you knew going into the hike. You lashed out at others in previous posts - I think you want to hear what you want to hear and you shut out the rest.
This is where the rubber meets the road - you wanna be a thruhiker - get off your ass, get out there and do it - that is barring any cardio physical limitations. Forget the foot pain and gain some mental fortitude and focus on the trail. If getting pissed off at me for not coddling you in your first attempt helps you, I can send you picture and you can spit on it every day (llama) if it keeps you on the trail. And tell hubby, "this is my dream and I need this" But really, puting it into perspective, he seems like a pretty good guy if he is willing to drive you back down to GA so you can get back on the trail.
'nuff said.

[VictoriaM]

All of this should have been stuff you considered before stepping on the trail. I don't understand the animal comment - Is your husband doing something to them while you are gone? But as I PM'ed back, based on your earlier threads, I didn't think you'd make it and I still don't think you'll make it. Everyone else can can console you about your feet or your pets or your plants or your marriage, but this was all stuff you knew going into the hike. You lashed out at others in previous posts - I think you want to hear what you want to hear and you shut out the rest.

I don't think you'll find a single post in this thread where I did anything like lashing out. Why, you ask, did I "lash out" at you and no one else? Because others who responded (though some of their statements were way off, especially some things said about my husband) honestly meant to be helpful. You didn't mean to be helpful, you just meant to be a prick. I called you on it, and now you're running to tattle and pout to the other forum members about how mean I am. If you're going to dish it out, learn how to take it.

The animals comment has to do with my two dogs being in crates from 7am to 7pm and 11pm to 6am every weekday while I'm gone, because has to sleep and go to work. I love my dogs and hate putting them through that, so it's something that weighed heavily on me in my decision. Every bit of "advice" you give me seems to advocate being completely heartless and caring about no one but myself. I'm not like that, and if you are I feel sorry for you and everyone who has to deal with you.

This is where the rubber meets the road - you wanna be a thruhiker - get off your ass, get out there and do it - that is barring any cardio physical limitations. Forget the foot pain and gain some mental fortitude and focus on the trail. If getting pissed off at me for not coddling you in your first attempt helps you, I can send you picture and you can spit on it every day (llama) if it keeps you on the trail. And tell hubby, "this is my dream and I need this" But really, puting it into perspective, he seems like a pretty good guy if he is willing to drive you back down to GA so you can get back on the trail. 'nuff said.

So what you're advocating here is walking on an injury that will only get worse with time unless it's rested enough to heal. I'm sorry if you think letting an injury recover means I have no fortitude, or whatever, but you'd be completely wrong about that. Getting "off my ass" would be counterproductive right now, as I need to stay off my feet until the pain is completely gone if I want to tendonitis to heal well. I'm not pissed at you either, I just think you acted like an ignorant prick in this particular thread. I don't know you from Adam, so I can't speak beyond this thread, and I'm not the type to get overly person with people over one thread posted on an internet forum.

[Skidsteer]

Wow.

Who needs Jerry Springer?

[Bravo]

I thought it was Spring today. I guess some folks still got the old cabin fever.

I love this part of WB. Learning and entertainment. Awesome.

I'm rooting for Toolshed and VM. I've got a full bag of chips and a free night. Drag this little screen play out.

[Yahtzee]

After reading the previous exchange, I am now ashamed I posted anything to this thread.

Best of luck, Vic. Come what may.

[Skidsteer]

After reading the previous exchange, I am now ashamed I posted anything to this thread.

Best of luck, Vic. Come what may.

Eh. Why?

It's just a spirited debate between passionate individuals. One of the things in life that differentiates us from corpses.

We just got good seats.

[STEVEM]

Victoria, I've read many of your threads and comments and understand that you feel that thru hiking the AT this year is something you feel you must do. I'm not sure I understand why you are so adverse to section hiking, or why you feel this will be your only opportunity to fulfill your dream.

I've never heard you explain why the AT is calling you. What are you looking for? What questions are you trying to answer? Why do you need this hike? Are you hiking toward something or away from something? Are you competing with someone or something? Are you trying to prove something to yourself or someone else?

Victoria, is there an invisible little girl on your shoulder whispering that you're not good enough or strong enough or entitled enough to succeed.

I'm not trying to be mean, but I've dealt with insecurity my entire life and think I know the symptoms when I see them.

You've asked many questions about how to hike the AT, but do you clearly know why you seem to need the trail so badly?

[Sly]

Jerry, Jerry, Jerry....

[MOWGLI]

(Using my best Howard Cosell voice) Down goes Toolshed! Down goes Toolshed!

[Yahtzee]

Eh. Why?

It's just a spirited debate between passionate individuals. One of the things in life that differentiates us from corpses.

We just got good seats.

Just not my idea of good hiker chat. Don't mind ripping on gear or trail sections or trail abstractions like purism or trail magic, but when things get personal I get uncomfortable. The trail may be the best part of some of our lives, but it is not life.

Can't we all just get along. And by get along, I mean go hiking.

[mudhead]

Why lurkers lurk...

Maybe she should take the dogs...

[ed bell]

The animals comment has to do with my two dogs being in crates from 7am to 7pm and 11pm to 6am every weekday while I'm gone, because has to sleep and go to work. I love my dogs and hate putting them through that, so it's something that weighed heavily on me in my decision. Every bit of "advice" you give me seems to advocate being completely heartless and caring about no one but myself. I'm not like that, and if you are I feel sorry for you and everyone who has to deal with you.

IMHO this "solution" allowing you to take time to make a thru-hike attempt is inhumane. 20 hours in a crate with 4 hours out weekly for 5+ months is something I doubt any dog owner could advocate. I urge you to find another solution. Other than that, anyone here who makes a comment about YOUR marriage situation, or dynamics has no clue what they are talking about. Don't sweat that. I would suggest that it might be in your best interests to keep some of your personal matters private. Give those feet time to recover and good luck to you.

[Marta]

I don't think you'll find a single post in this thread where I did anything like lashing out. Why, you ask, did I "lash out" at you and no one else?

Sorry, V, but you lash out at people all the time. Anyone who doesn't agree with you or who suggests that you might in any way be causing your own problems gets a taste of the whip.

But, as so many other have pointed out, it is an amusing show.

Marta/Five-Leaf

[VictoriaM]

SteveM - I know you're not being mean. I do have very clear (in my mind) reasons for wanting to do a thru. I doubt I could explain them well, though. It's not about insecurity or provong anything, but rather about finding out a few things. There are specific questions I want answered, and I feel that a thru is exactly the setting I need to be in in order to answer them

ed bell - That's exactly the problem, and we are working towards a solution. That's not to say that the dogs were the only factor in my indecision about returning, but it was a big one.

Sorry, V, but you lash out at people all the time. Anyone who doesn't agree with you or who suggests that you might in any way be causing your own problems gets a taste of the whip.

You're right, I do keep the whip at hand. I don't suffer fools gladly, so when someone behaves like a fool towards me, I'm more than happy to let them have it. If you look at all my posts, though, you'll see that I'm very kind to anyone who is kind to me, and even to people who make honest mistakes. It's deliberate ruseness that gets me going. And by "anyone who suggests that you might in any way be causing your own problems" I assume you're refering to the people who think that my pink backpack is a good reason for someone to attack me with violent sexual threats. Feel free to feel that way, and I feel bad for any friend or family member of yours who gets raped or mugged.

At any rate, Toolshed didn't say anything about causing my own problems or the like. What he did was throw profanity at me while implying that caring about my husband and pets is weak and silly. Sorry if you disagree, but it seems to me he needed the lash.

[Marta]

And then there's this tendency to put words in other people's mouths and then attack them for what they "said."

[Bravo]

There are specific questions I want answered, and I feel that a thru is exactly the setting I need to be in in order to answer them

You got questions. I got answers. I'll answer anything you ever wanted to know. Try me.

"anyone who suggests that you might in any way be causing your own problems"

I guess those might be the same people who suggest that you might in any way be causing your own solutions.

Just a thought. Some might call it taking responsibility for your life.

[DawnTreader]

Llama punch.. HAHAHA this is one of the funniest trailnames I have ever heard... If its like a donkey punch, with a Llama instead.. HAHAHA Brilliant....I'd like to hear you explain yourself out of this one when asked by a respectable person.....hahaha

[rickb]

I wish I had not looked up "donkey punch" on wikipedia.

[Lilred]

I'm rootin for ya Vic. Maybe you could get a neighborhood kid that's responsible enough to come over and let the dogs out of their crates. You could prolly hire one cheap.

[T-Dubs]

.You're right, I do keep the whip at hand. I don't suffer fools gladly, so when someone behaves like a fool towards me, I'm more than happy to let them have it.

"We be nice to them, if they be nice to us." (LotR)

This type of thread is a tough one for me. It's like one of those algebra problems back in high school where the only thing I could think is, "I don't know enough to figure this out. There has to be some more information somewhere. I don't know enough. How can any one figure this stuff out?"

But then, I struggled some in high school.

Tom