Hiker Funk Rant

[Another Kevin]

Yup... Given the nature of camping/hiking at times some level of funk is to be expected however no excuse for folks who lack basic hygiene. Especially so on the AT as usually there is no lack of water.

When I've smelt my worst on trail, the problem hasn't been a lack of water. (I do bring soap, a nylon bucket, and a piece of dollar-store chamois, and use them to bathe and wash socks.) It was because of an excess of water. When you've been hiking for days on a trail where the answer to, 'where's the next water?' is 'you're standing in it,' things start to reek, partly if not mostly of mildew (although beaver swamp water isn't very pleasant even when fresh). Stale DEET, and the Gurney Goo that I used to wax my feet, only added additional notes to the overall miasma. The peppermint scent of Dr Bronners was lost in the cloud.

After a trip in those conditions, my wife picked me up and we drove back to my car (rather a drive, it had been nearly a sixty-mile section, and the road took the long way round) with all the car windows open.

Despite the fact that it was snowing at the time.

And this was with bathing daily and washing a pair of socks every few hours. (I needed to do that anyway, to get the silt out of them, or they'd have rubbed my feet raw.)

Sometimes you just stink, and there's no help for it.
Fortunately, the AT isn't that wet in hiking season, even in Vermud.

[Dogwood]

Ditto the beaver swamp water and mud... rank wet feet...and body ohdoor...in an over packed AT or Daks lean to. Then, the cheesy burnt bean farts and snoring begin. Throw in some drunks, stale alcohol odors, rapacious mice, a safety meeting held too close to the shelter, leak roofy in the one spot over where you're trying to vainly sleep, a thru hiker holding court endlessly jawing about how everyone else is doing it wrong, and it completes the AT NOBO bubble scene.

[DownEaster]

If you're concerned about gram counting then shave your exceptionally long beard, trim your pit and nether region hair, you'll lose some grams and reduce your bacteria count and stinkability.

It doesn't work that way. Body hair wicks the moisture away from the skin where it can evaporate better, rather than leaving it to support stinky bacteria growth. The reason people who shave have less stink is because shaving involves washing with soap or shaving cream. Skip the shaving, but don'tskip the washing.

[Dogwood]

Hair can harbor bacteria. More hair can lead to more surface area for harboring more bacteria. This is cited by some doctors as one reason why hair is shaved before surgery. Since bacteria is one cause of armpit odor....trim your pits. I do it. Anecdotally, it makes some difference but is not a one size fits all magic silver bulllet. Other factors such as diet, behaviors, emotions, various illicit and pharmaceutical drug use, etc can also be involved. This is according to medical doctors I asked.

[El JP]

Ditto the beaver swamp water and mud... rank wet feet...and body ohdoor...in an over packed AT or Daks lean to. Then, the cheesy burnt bean farts and snoring begin. Throw in some drunks, stale alcohol odors, rapacious mice, a safety meeting held too close to the shelter, leak roofy in the one spot over where you're trying to vainly sleep, a thru hiker holding court endlessly jawing about how everyone else is doing it wrong, and it completes the AT NOBO bubble scene.

Got to fervently hope that the weather holds enough to allow convenient tent use until enough people drop out.

[MuddyWaters]

Got to fervently hope that the weather holds enough to allow convenient tent use until enough people drop out.

I think sheer numbers require that no matter what

[fastfoxengineering]

Ditto the beaver swamp water and mud... rank wet feet...and body ohdoor...in an over packed AT or Daks lean to. Then, the cheesy burnt bean farts and snoring begin. Throw in some drunks, stale alcohol odors, rapacious mice, a safety meeting held too close to the shelter, leak roofy in the one spot over where you're trying to vainly sleep, a thru hiker holding court endlessly jawing about how everyone else is doing it wrong, and it completes the AT NOBO bubble scene.

Well said. Im trying to avoid staying in shelters however every so often that "scene" is worth eating dinner with lol. Then move on to the tent.

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[Highland Goat]

I like a kilt for increased ventilation.

[Leo L.]

It too easy to wash your parts daily?
One reason why I switched from TP to water (+soap) long ago.

[wordstew]

If I didn't think a bear would become a bear snack. I would leave a few tiny hotel soap bars at a few of the shelters I frequent....may a couple of free sponges

[wordstew]

If I didn't think a bear would become a bear snack. I would leave a few tiny hotel soap bars at a few of the shelters I frequent....may a couple of free sponges

I meant if I didn't think it would become a bear snack

[Harrison Bergeron]

Hate to be the one to inform you, OP, but there's going to be some discomfort involved with the idea of climbing three mountains a day for the next six months. Hiker funk is the least of it, and there is literally nothing you can do about it. A wet-wipe bath every day might feel good, but it's like spitting in the ocean -- you're still going to stink.

Instead of worrying about how you smell, worry about how to stay healthy. You can't wash your body enough to keep down that stank, but maybe you can wash your hands enough to avoid diarrhea. You gotta pick your battles.

And my tip of the day would be to avoid carrying around a plastic bag full of your used TP, as is so often suggested by internet hikers on this site. Without that festering colony of E-Coli in your pack, your funk will at least not smell like ****!

[BuckeyeBill]

Hate to be the one to inform you, OP, but there's going to be some discomfort involved with the idea of climbing three mountains a day for the next six months. Hiker funk is the least of it, and there is literally nothing you can do about it. A wet-wipe bath every day might feel good, but it's like spitting in the ocean -- you're still going to stink.

Instead of worrying about how you smell, worry about how to stay healthy. You can't wash your body enough to keep down that stank, but maybe you can wash your hands enough to avoid diarrhea. You gotta pick your battles.

And my tip of the day would be to avoid carrying around a plastic bag full of your used TP, as is so often suggested by internet hikers on this site. Without that festering colony of E-Coli in your pack, your funk will at least not smell like ****!

Harrison, you bring up some interesting points. You're right about wet wipes, but it takes several to do a good job. Instead people should use a cloth/bandana with a drop or two of Dr. Bonner's soap to remove the layer of dirt and sweat. Used correctly, you can really cut down on the smell. You can rinse of by using the same cloth. Take another bandana and dry off.

You are also correct about having clean hands when cooking. Also, don't let any hands touch your trail mix or food. Instead dump it into their/your hand or their pot. I also use a hand sanitizer before cooking.

Packing out your TP is part of LNT recommendations. I use two zip lock baggies, one covered with duct tape and the other left plain. The tape is just to stop people from seeing your used TP. The plain bag is the one that contains the dirty TP. It is then placed into the taped bag. It is carried in the front mess pouch next to my toilet kit. When I come to a trash can I can deposit the plain bag and get a fresh one out. I don't have to touch the used paper after putting it into the bag. I grab a small stick and push it down into the bag so I can fit more in the bag. You then use the same stick to mark your cathole after refilling the hole.

[rocketsocks]

Don’t people bring a haul bag anymore, or is that to much weight, I love mine and would hike without it.

[rocketsocks]

n’t....................

[blw2]

haul bag?
(more words to make the post long enough to post)

[rocketsocks]

Water bag.......

[rocketsocks]

More over, a Light weighed siliconized bag that looks like a upside down Chefs hat, at least mine does. It can be hung or placed on the Ground and wont spill due to its geometry.

[PaBroadleaf]

I might have to utilize my casino riff-raff strategy which is to light up a big fowl smelling cigar in hopes of driving them a comfortable distance away.
The first time someone with hiker superfunk says "dude that thing stinks" I think i'm gonna have a pretty good chuckle

You can hike with me anytime! I always have a travel humidor on me with some Perdomo and Drew Estate sticks...

[rocketsocks]

Arturo: Hemmingway short story’s are pretty good at cuttin’ funky butt.