You know, or you should know, you are not a LD hiker when:

[Dogwood]

You're posts exceed your hiking miles.

You're a bit perplexed with the meaning of the LD abbreviation.

You are still using the Coleman rectangular synthetic 4 lb 25 *sleeping bag, still in near pristine condition, as you did 30 yrs ago with the 1985 manufacturing tag still attached.

You've never bought, built, considered, or know about alchy stoves or anything other than a 5 lb Coleman white gas stove. If you questioned what alchy means before being told...umm...

You're BIG 5 includes a Coleman cooler.

You take a foldable fishing chair with integrated cup holders in the armrests on every "hike."

You consider European mountaineering thick leather steel toed and shanked waterproof boots a must for every hike.

You carry an equally large Rambo or Crocodile Dundee "shank" on every "hike."

You consider that canvas tent brought back from Nam your shelter of choice.

Canned spam, vienna sausages, sardines and potatoes are what's regularly in your food satchel. You also tend to leave the empty tins wherever you happen to be knowing the required Homecoming size campfire ring is a good place to dispose of them as the trail maintenance elves will be coming along in the middle of the night to take away your trash.

[Sarcasm the elf]

I was willing to take this in good humor until you took a swipe at Sardines, that's going too far.

[WingedMonkey]

I was willing to take this in good humor until you took a swipe at Sardines, that's going too far.

And it appears he don't know that Vienna sausages now come in retort bags.

[Another Kevin]

You know you're not a long distance hiker when ... you don't hike long distances. That's me. Well, and seeing how much Elf enjoys his sardines has made me consider carrying them myself.

[Dogwood]

[Hangfire]

You get to Black Gap Shelter and realize you left your tent at home.

Or maybe that's more like "you know you're unprepared to hike the AT when..."

[archie]

You are still using the Coleman rectangular synthetic 4 lb 25 *sleeping bag, still in near pristine condition, as you did 30 yrs ago with the 1985 manufacturing tag still attached.

I just cant believe 1985 was thirty years ago....

Time flies when you are LD.

[gregpphoto]

And yet people have completed long distance hikes carrying some of the above. Guess that dampers your logic. Also, I hope you've hiked more than 9,847 mikes or else yer nothing but a hypocrite.

[ironbutt]

I guess I'm a LD as I still have my OD shelter half , pre-nam GI sleeping bag, folding tenching tool and I am partial to beenie-weenie's and Tang...

[lemon b]

Rain is a major issue.

[Kenai]

@Dogwood
You don't like my boots?

[The Cleaner]

You don't know what the early signs of hypothermia are.

[bigcranky]

I just cant believe 1985 was thirty years ago....

Me neither, that's the year we got married.

[BirdBrain]

Me neither, that's the year we got married.

Congrats. We are one year behind you. Our 30th comes next June. Have you made it to yours yet? That is a big deal these days. If so, happy anniversary. You are definitely doing it right. As to the thread........ I got nothing.

[kayak karl]

Boredom sets in before Damascus

[Slo-go'en]

And yet people have completed long distance hikes carrying some of the above. Guess that dampers your logic. Also, I hope you've hiked more than 9,847 mikes or else yer nothing but a hypocrite.

Dogwood has probably hiked at least that many miles. My post count is starting to exceed my mileage though. Someday I should try and figure out how many miles I have on my knees...

[RangerZ]

And it appears he don't know that Vienna sausages now come in retort bags.

All this talk of food made me hungry, I broke out a single serving SPAM for breakfast.

[Malto]

And yet people have completed long distance hikes carrying some of the above. Guess that dampers your logic. Also, I hope you've hiked more than 9,847 mikes or else yer nothing but a hypocrite.

Im guessing dogwood as a tad more than 9847 miles hiked.

[gregpphoto]

Im guessing dogwood as a tad more than 9847 miles hiked.

Fair enough then.

[Just Bill]

You're posts exceed your hiking miles.

You're a bit perplexed with the meaning of the LD abbreviation.
You are still using the Coleman rectangular synthetic 4 lb 25 *sleeping bag, still in near pristine condition, as you did 30 yrs ago with the 1985 manufacturing tag still attached.
You've never bought, built, considered, or know about alchy stoves or anything other than a 5 lb Coleman white gas stove. If you questioned what alchy means before being told...umm...
You're BIG 5 includes a Coleman cooler.
You take a foldable fishing chair with integrated cup holders in the armrests on every "hike."
You consider European mountaineering thick leather steel toed and shanked waterproof boots a must for every hike.
You carry an equally large Rambo or Crocodile Dundee "shank" on every "hike."
You consider that canvas tent brought back from Nam your shelter of choice.
Canned spam, vienna sausages, sardines and potatoes are what's regularly in your food satchel. You also tend to leave the empty tins wherever you happen to be knowing the required Homecoming size campfire ring is a good place to dispose of them as the trail maintenance elves will be coming along in the middle of the night to take away your trash.

You're a bit perplexed that your wife now refers to you on her mommy forums as "LD". (Lazy Dad)
You had to buy a 36x84 rectangular REI pad that weighs 4.5 pounds for your wife to car camp on because "the baby needs it".
The tag is still attached because you hope to return it by next season.
Instead of tanking up on beers at a trail town you sit and drink them at home so alchy now has a different meaning.
Your big 5 go in your cooler- whole milk, 2% milk, greek yogurt, cheese, jelly, and whiskey.
Your kids have their own special REI chair with sippy cup holders.
You consider an aluminum framed thick cordura osprey kid carrier a must for every hike.
You carry at least two butter knives so you can always whip up an emergency PB&J.
A Bill Mason style canvas tent with wings and stove port now seems a practical shelter when you are packing for two adults and two kids who don't understand sleeping under a tarp.
Squeeze packs of veggie glop, plastic tubs of applesauce, goldfish, and veggie sticks (potato being the best flavor) now go into your diaper satchel.
If you aren't careful all the car campground elves (coons, chipmunks, and other ground dwelling rodents) will get your food or children in the middle of the night.

At least I've got enough miles banked though that I'm still good on the post count thing for now.